Walt Disney World
Frequently Asked Walt Disney World Ticket Questions
What do admission tickets include?
Admission during regular hours, interaction with other guests, bathroom priviliges, all the drinking-fountain water you can drink, and occasional alligator sightings. Everything else is subject to additional charges.
How do I decide what kind of ticket to buy?
By seeing how much money you have.
What is a "hard ticket" event?
Any event that it's hard to get a ticket for. This includes Mickey's Very Merry Halloween Party, Mickey's Not So Joyous Night, breakfast in the castle, etc. You can't use regular park tickets for these events, and they'll just laugh at you if you try.
What are discounts like for seniors, veterans, AAA, etc.?
Minimal. Your best strategy is to purchase tickets in bulk, in advance. Call 1-407-YE4POFX and they'll happily take your money over the phone, mail you your tickets, and charge a handling fee that partially offsets any savings.
Are there specials for Florida residents?
Yes! Florida residents are able to visit Disney World any time they like without having to purchase airfare.
Do I have to purchase tickets directly from Disney?
No! Tickets are also available on eBay, through Nigerian mail-order outlets, and from shady guys in back alleys. These tickets can often be had at a significant discount, and sometimes aren't even counterfeit or otherwise worthless. If you want added convenience and home delivery, call 1-407-XD4RODY (tell them DisneyLies sent you!)
Do I have to show ID when purchasing a ticket?
You must present a valid photo ID (driver's license, passport, Photopass) at the time of purchase, register your biometric data after purchase, and submit to bioscan and fingerprinting when you actually use your ticket. Your name will also be searched for on the federal "No Play" list, and you will be denied access to the park if your name is even vaguely similar to that of a known terrorist, insurgent, or annoying annual-pass holder, or Disney blogger.
What is a biometric scan?
A completely legal method of adding your personal data to a privately held national database so that your location and purchasing habits can be tracked at all times for marketing, promotional, and security purchases. According to a California University Department of Conspiracy report, biometric scans are generally considered less invasive and more legally acceptable than tattooing three sixes on your forehead.
Can I use a water park ticket for admission to a theme park?
Sure! Just go around the side of any Disney World theme park and present your ticket to the person holding the ladder against the wall.
What if I buy a five-day pass but only use three days?
If you did not purchase the "no expiration" option on your ticket, the two remaining days are converted into cash and become part of the Walt Disney Company CEO's annual bonus.
I have an old Magic Kingdom ticket from 1983 that I never used. Can I use it?
Certainly! Old tickets may be traded to collectors, sold on eBay, or turned in at any Disney World ticket booth for display in the back-stage Museum of Crazy Guest Requests.
Can I upgrade my five-day ticket to a ten-day, park-hopper, no-expiration ticket?
Just bring your ticket to any Disney World ticket booth and they will happily upgrade your ticket and charge you a fee base on an incomprehensible algorithm related to your original purchase date and star sign.
We'd like to extend our stay at Disney World. Can I upgrade my ten-day ticket to an eleven-day ticket?
What kind of tickets can't I upgrade?
Used tickets, Disneyland tickets, forged tickets, expired tickets, tickets only available to special groups (AAA members, Democrats, foreign dictators), Universal Studios tickets, and tickets that were eaten by your dog.
Can I change my Magic Your Way ticket into an annual pass?
Possibly, but it would be difficult. Tickets and annual passes don't look anything alike. You'd have to completely redo the artwork, change the magnetic-strip information, etc. Frankly, it's probably easier just to buy an annual pass.
I have a whole bunch of Disney World tickets that I got by putting my ticket on a photocopying machine and pushing a button repeatedly. Can I use them?
We'd love to see you try!
When does Disney typically raise ticket prices?
When you aren't looking.
How can I find out current ticket prices and get actual answers to my real ticket questions because I'm sick and tired of all the bullshit on this stupid Web site?
Can I use my Disney World Magic Your Way ticket at Disneyland, Disneyland Paris, Canadian Disneyland, etc?
Possibly, but in general the cost of driving from Florida to the other park makes the transaction uneconomical. You're better off just visiting Epcot for another day or something
Want more lies?
Get the book!