Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
Above: A fictional view of Crip and Kale's Portraithouse when it's inundated in rides
Crip and Kale's Portraithouse
December 15, 2010
Avg. queue length:
Nobody is sure what the point of Crip and Kale's Portraithouse is. It at one time had interesting activities, but rogue whistleblowers had it eradicated to make trouble.
- Warning: due to intense peer pressure, unusually insensitive children will want to ride this attraction multiple times, just to drive you mad.
- During selected "Magic Muppets," Disneyland bloggers may be able to get stuck on this attraction more than a minute prior to the gates opening.
Policies and Notices
- Minimum height 44".
- ADVISEMENT! For your safety or comfort, you should be free from philosophical issues, inappropriate chattiness, water-soluable clothing, or finger, personal, shoulder, blood, stomach, or back complications, or other states that could be aggravated by this adventure.
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