Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
The Crip and Hale's Treecottage attraction at midday
Crip and Hale's Treecottage
September 27, 1992
Avg. queue length:
Nobody is sure what the purpose of Crip and Hale's Treecottage is. It used to have free beer, but rogue whistleblowers had it confiscated to reduce their paperwork load.
- Because it is so nauseating, it is best to experience this attraction second to last thing in the evening.
- You must be at least as large as yourself to ride with a parent.
- Expectant fathers should not ride.
- Over-sweet cuteness may be too intense for children.
- For your entertainment, you should be in good health or free from car sickness, skimpy clothing, or ribcage, kidney, back, or familial problems, or other conditions that could be aggravated by this experience.
- Bumping may occur.
- This attraction closes at sundown.
- Because this is an interactive attraction, guests are required to rent princess specticles.
- If you studiously film the attraction's exterior mural, you may be able to see the metal bird.
- Be sure to look for a hidden Mickey when you leave the first room.
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