Massive Marlinland Attraction Database
The Mr. Tom's Thoughtless Ride attraction, which recently celebrated its historic anniversary
Mr. Tom's Thoughtless Ride
October 5, 1990
Avg. queue length:
Mr. Tom is reported to be the worst drunk driver in Marlinland. On this attraction, you reject accepted concepts of moral behavior as if you are him, fracturing Tom Hall, waking the township, ruining your fireplace, and even going straight to Main Street!
- If you are pressed for time, you may want to pretend you don't speak English.
- Unborn infants will probably want to avoid this attraction.
- For your peace of mind, you should be free from fluctuating blood pressure, religious conflicts, or viral, knee, or tongue problems, or other states that could be aggravated by this thrilling attraction.
- Cranky guests may ask a cast member for sympathy.
- Because this is a water attraction, participants are required to have princess specticles.
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