Disney Lies

There was a major goofup last night involving the closing of Disney’s Virtual Magic Kingdom online guest simulation. Apparently, the memo saying that the online park would be going offline permanently last night at 10 p.m. was worded in a less than rigorous manner, causing some cast members to believe that it was Walt Disney World’s Magic Kingdom that was to be closed permanently.

Signs were placed outside the Magic Kingdom after closing explaining that the park was being shuttered, and ever-efficient Disney maintenance crews spent the night dismantling the park and preparing it for storage. By the time the mistake was discovered (at around 6:30 a.m. this morning), Adventureland, Liberty Square, and about half of Frontierland had been boxed, labeled, and prepared for shipping. Tom Sawyer Island had already been returned to its natural swampy condition, and the Country Bears were running wild in the absence of county animal-control officers.

“We were pretty embarrassed about the whole situation,” said Magic Kingdom spokesperson Beaufort “Clueless” Hamhead. “We think we can get the whole thing back together in a couple of weeks, and we’re already sending nice notes of apology to all the people we sacked, especially the ones we inadvertently put in crates instead of sending home.”