Posts Tagged ‘people who will believe anything’

Line Free Monday!

Monday, April 1st, 2013

Sorry for the late-breaking news, but our inside sources have discovered that today — Monday — Disneyland will be inviting annual passholders to beta test a new service: Line Free.

Line Free isn’t a new version of FASTPASS; it’s an entirely new system. Guests who have a Line Free RFID wristband will be able to enter any attraction — Star Tours, Space Mountain, Peter Pan, Dumbo, or anything else — without waiting in line. This isn’t a separate line or a single rider line, but a guarantee that when you want to ride, there will be no line at all! Just walk on — no waiting!

The wristband will work for food locations as well. Want a churro? There’s no line. Popcorn? No line. Dinner at the Blue Bayou? Just walk on in and your food is already at the table, waiting for you. Character autographs are equally easy to get; show your wristband, step in front of the other guests, and get Alice’s autograph while the curses of the less privileged roll off your back like river water off a feral duck. When the program leaves beta and becomes generally available, it will even work for park entry, retail locations, parades, hotel rooms, and restrooms! Even posted park hours won’t apply!

There is no way to sign up for the Line Free beta ahead of time. For one day only, randomly selected annual passholders will be invited to participate in the test when they enter Disneyland park. If you visit the park but are not invited to participate, we suggest that you exit the park (do not get a hand stamp!) and re-enter, showing your valid annual pass again. Repeat until you are selected. You may get some funny looks from cast members at the gate and/or be questioned by security, but believe us — if you follow these instructions, you won’t be waiting in line for any attractions!