During our most recent visit to Disneyland, we stopped by the Gibson Girl Ice Cream Parlor to check out its new design. We were very distressed to discover that the famous green-glass elephant was no longer on display.
According to castmembers, the elephant was removed as part of Disney’s new fight against childhood obesity. Said someone we talked to, "Elephants just aren’t the right symbol for American children. The plan is to melt down the elephant and recast it as something more image positive, such as a flamingo or well-balanced meal."
We invite you to send heated letters to Disneyland management to protest this affront to history and translucent pachydermery.