DisneyLies Official Best & Worst: Disney Memories

Best

  • Walking down a deserted Main Street after the park had been evacuated for some false alarm or another.
  • On a cold night, the smell of a warm churro purchased with your last $15.
  • Meeting Walt Disney himself in the park, shaking his hand, suggesting that he open an inexpensive, state-themed park where the parking lot currently was, and then listening for an hour and a half as he detailed all the problems with that idea.
  • Being able to look at a few seconds of some ancient movie for only a penny.
  • A five-hour Jungle Cruise on which skipper John Lasseter explained in brilliant detail the back story of every single creature we passed.
  • Laughing so hard at the wacky antics of a costumed character that an ambulance has to be summoned.

Worst

  • Going to Disneyland alone for your birthday and asking the park photographer if they can insert someone else into the photo so you’ll look less pathetic.
  • Standing for an hour in the Matterhorn queue only to find that you’ve somehow circled the mountain and ended up back where you started.
  • Fifteen painful minutes desperately trying to locate the Innoventions restroom.
  • Getting caught shoplifting from the Emporium and having to choose between prosecution or two hours on Star Tours vomit-cleanup duty (we chose prosecution).
  • Accidentally referring to the Matterhorn as “Magic Mountain” in front of a tour group from a Disneyana convention.
  • Years of therapy bills after the kids happen to catch a glimpse of one of the costumed characters (Alice) with her head off.

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