In no particular order:
- Scratch a hard-to-reach place on your back
- Have a friend hold it in their lips, then cut it in half with a whip
- Use it as a tiny cane
- Strap it to your chest and see what airport security has to say
- Jokingly hold it under your nose as a cinnamon-flavored mustache
- Shred it for use as hamster bedding
- Use it as a handy holder for a stack of donuts
- Toss it into a hurricane and see if it will go straight through a tree
- Coat it in poison and put it at the bottom of a pit trap
- Make a lamp out of it
- Sniff it while on Soarin’ Over California to experience the lovely cinnamon-orange scent
- Prop up a box to make a trap to catch cute little bunny rabbits
- Conduct a symphony
- Poke an attacking shark in the eye
- Hold open the eyes of a giant that deserves the Clockwork Orange treatment
- Wrap it in foil and reenact the “cucumber” scene from Spinal Tap
- Participate in Jedi training
- Throw it at a clown who’s out of pies
- At the Pacific Wharf Cafe, ask, “Can you skip the bread bowl and just put my soup in this?”
- Bend it; throw it; catch it when it comes back
- Paint it; light it; join a candle-light procession
- Plant it and hope it grows into a delicious tree
- Bake it inside a cake so that it can more easily be smuggled into prison
- Use it as a peg leg on your life-size gingerbread pirate ship model
- Bring it to guest services and see if you can trade it for a turkey leg
- Replace a missing Lego technic rod
- Drop it in a bottle of diet Coke and see if it explodes
- Replace the broken dowel on a hand-made towel rack
- Use it as a last-minute substitute rolling pin
- Show off your strength by using it as a bat to break a table leg
- Brace a broken table leg
- In Innoventions, pretend that it’s the new cordless Rock Band microphone
- Use it (and your fingers) to count to 11
- Bury it for the entertainment of future archaeologists
- Hollow it out and use it as a glass for long, tall drinks
- Attach your “trader” pins to it
- Try to convince folks that it’s Oswald the Lucky Rabbit’s famous pal, Mr. Stick
- Paddle an Explorer Canoe
- Use it to measure a tower in “churro units”
- Contribute to the filling of a local landfill
- Hang it from a string next to the door as a handy sugar lick
- Mail it to the Smithsonian so it can be preserved for the enjoyment of future generations
- Test a very large car’s oil level
- Send it to scientists for detailed chemical analysis and/or carbon dating
- Keep it as a souvenir of the time that you bought so many churros that you couldn’t even eat one more without becoming seriously ill
- Keep it as a souvenir of the time you couldn’t eat even one churro without becoming seriously ill
- Give it to Billy Hill to use as a spare bow
- Slice it into disks and play tidily winks
- Run it over with a steamroller so that you have the longest, flattest, old churro in the world
- Replace Jafar’s staff and see if he notices
- Replace the wicked queen’s cauldron stirrer and see if she notices
- Replace Michael Eisner and see if anyone notices
- Whittle a chain out of it
- Feed a soon-to-be-malnourished pet
- Go on Autopia and pretend it’s a gear shift
- Pole vault a very low fence
- Throw it on the floor of a restaurant and see who can name all the health codes you’ve just broken
- Give it a cute name, put a dress on it, and tell everyone that it’s your new best friend who will never betray you by telling things that you had made it swear it would never tell on pain of death (unlike some people that you could mention)
- Put cotton candy on the ends to make a delicious giant Q-Tip
- Prop open a lion’s mouth so it can’t bite you
- Tell a jolly joke about how it looks so much like a stick that it must be “sticky.” (Repeat until parents and/or friends beg for mercy)
- Hold it at arms length and run around on the PeopleMover track (since there’s nothing else going on up there)
- Take it on the Tower of Terror, let it go, and watch it hover mysteriously in the air for a split second
- Bar a castle door so invaders can’t get in
- Sell it on eBay and retire with all the money you make
- Bring it to a local school as an educational example of rotational symmetry
- Use it as a replacement PDA stylus
- On the Disneyland Railroad, throw it to the t-rex and yell “Fetch!”
- Practice sword swallowing
- Rub two of them together to start a fire
- Ask those Mythbusters guys to blow it up
- Twist it into a pretzel (for the irony)
- Barter for an old chimichanga
- Wait until it dies, then see if you can get it a position as Happy Haunt #1,000
- Take it on Space Mountain to see what a churro in space would look like
- Travel to Denmark and plug a hole in a dike so that the little Dutch boy can take a break
- Try to lose it, then scream in horror as it somehow manages to find its way back to you again and again
- Surgically replace a shattered bone
- Kill a vampire
- Find a notorious gangster who is attempting to get away from the police and throw it through the spokes of his bicycle
- Burn it to ashes; spread the ashes in the Haunted Mansion
- Put it in a safety deposit box as a legacy for your descendants
- Sharpen one end and give it to Mickey to sign autographs with
- Play “Rock, Paper, Churro”
- Make an emergency replacement flute
- Attach a heating element and electrical cord, wait until November, then give it to Rapunzel
- Do your famous “Pinocchio” imitation
- After a performance of “Two Brothers,” tell people you’re not crying, you’ve just got a bit of this old churro in your eye
- Throw it in Splash Mountain to see if it will float
- Try to bribe a guard who’s throwing you out of the park
- Go on the Mission Tortilla tour, wrap it in a freshly made tortilla, and enjoy a tasty churrito
- Take it with you into the Disney Animation building to find out what Disney character it is most like
- Go to first aid and tell them you’re sick; when they ask you to open your mouth and say “Aaah,” tell them you brought your own tongue depressor
- Use it (and thousands like it) to build the world’s biggest “ship made out of toothpicks”
- Put it in the Large Hadron Collider and accelerate it to near the speed of light so that its mass increases 7,000 fold and it’s large enough to feed everyone in South America
- See if it can be brought back to life with electrodes and lightning
- Take it to the streets of San Francisco and club a mime into submission
- Rub it for good luck
- Stare at it until it boggles your mind
- Just eat it anyway