Disney Lies

Epcot’s China pavilion was overrun on Friday night by tourists hoping to catch the Olympic opening ceremonies. “Sometimes we forget just how like the real China our pavilion is,” said supposed Walt Disney World cultural ambassador Princess Fuzzbucket. “It’s only natural that some people would think that the Olympics are being hosted here, but we weren’t prepared for more than 15,000 guests showing up.”

“I’d just rather go here than off to some country with all different time zones and bathrooms and weird food and some gibberish for language and an alphabet,” said Ed Xenophobe, a Disney World guest from Isolation, Kansas. “Each Epcot pavilion is technically part of the host country — or is that embassies? — but anyway it’s as real as the real place and Disney should have done a better job of having the Olympics here, that’s all I’m saying.”

This isn’t the first time that guests have had trouble distinguishing Epcot pavilions from actual countries. For example:

• It is common to find guests in the U.K. pavilion wandering about looking for the entrance to the “chunnel” to the France pavilion.
• In 1989 a group of protesters smuggled sledgehammers into the park and attempted to bring down a wall in Germany.
• Guests occasionally comment that Norway is “a bigger country than they imagined it would be.”
• Cast members in the American Adventure occasionally have to be disciplined when they forget themselves and attempt to hire day laborers from the Mexico pavilion.