Disneyland strikes back!

Disneyland management continues to be ireful at the recent theft of Tom Sawyer Island’s Fort Wilderness by a group of dissatisfied annual passholders who were angry with the island’s pirate overlay. Management has decided that the incident cannot be allowed to go unpunished, but the problem of retribution remains in that they have to date been unable to positively identify the cuplrits.

So the decision was made to punish all annual passholders for the deeds of those few.

“As of August 1,” said Head of Corporate Affairs Maria Thornly, “the Disney Gallery will be permanently closed. This will surely come as a blow to Disneyland’s annual passholders, many of whom enjoyed wandering its halls and viewing important artwork and memorabilia from Disneyland’s past, and concept art hinting at its future. Those few who knew how to actually get a balcony seat for Fantasmic! viewing will surely be doubly disappointed. Perhaps this will cause them to think twice before again attempting to blackmail the Walt Disney Company with threats of petty thievery.”

Rumors are that the Disney Gallery will be returned to its former apartment format and made part of Disney’s timeshare program.

In related news, Walt Disney World management is currently engaged in battle with passholders over the “magic wand” above Epcot’s Spaceship Earth. “They’re stealing parts of it as fast as we can repair it,” said one maintenance lead, hopped up on too much coffee after days without sleep. Rumor has it that cast members sympathetic to the protestor’s dislike for Epcot’s current character-heavy trend may be aiding the rebels. How will management retalliate? We’ll let you know as soon as we do!

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